Is toxic Femininity a thing?

I feel like there’s so many preconceived notions these days about women in the workforce. We as women push these ideals onto each other. Ramming them down each other’s throats.

You should be at doctor.

You should do this.

You should do that.

In recent days the media has done a fine job of teaching women to be strong. To be independent. That we don’t need a man. This is all true. But we as humans don’t need anything. It’s not about a woman needing a man, or vice versa a man needing a woman. But that’s not all together true, is it?

If this pandemic has taught us anything it’s that we all need each other. we are refusing to wear masks because we want to see each other’s faces. We need to see that smile to know we are accepted.

We are refusing to not gather in groups. Because we need to be with each other.

I do not agree with the people that decide not to wear masks, or still gather in large groups. But I can sympathize.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. Toxic femininity.

As of late I’ve been afraid to voice my wants. I want to stay home with my child. My want to take care of the house. I want to be able to support my husband with something as simple as cooking and cleaning. I’ve been hesitant to bring this up, because I have had one too many conversations where people turn that word support into serve.

I come from a rather long line of women that serve their husbands. I know the difference between support and serve. I bristle at the thought of someone calling it my wifely duty. Yes, I’ve brought this up in the past and been told it is my wifely duty to serve my husband. But, that is the completely opposite end of the spectrum what I’m talking about today. Perhaps, that could be a story for another day?

All I can do now is hope that I will be better. That I will set an example for my daughter. That I will raise her in an environment that inspires her to find her own way. To not be boxed in to any category. She doesn’t have to be anything anyone expects her to be. All the while I will be here, to give her whatever support she needs. She can always come to me and never feel embarrassed or ashamed of what she wants to do and who she wants to be.

Let me know your thoughts on this topic. I would love to start with the conversation about this thought. To help me understand things better, and get my thoughts in a row. As you can tell I’m fairly confused at the moment.

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